Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Various Goings On as of Late

The #1 going on as of late has been moving apartments.  For the third freaking time (fourth if you factor in our temporary accommodation Martin's company put us up in for the first 2 weeks).  I lived in the USA 24 years and didn't move this many times - almost.  Oy vei.  Pain in my ass.

But I have to have an excuse for living out of cardboard boxes and having piles of clothes on the floor, so here are some social activities that have prevented me from keeping a decent house:

A friends 'hen do'

A hen do is a bachelorette party.  Different countries call it different things, and for some reason the verb 'do' means party outside of the USA.  And a bachelorette is a hen.

A bachelor, regrettably, is not called a cock - oh how appropriate that would be - but rather a stag, or sometimes buck, both being a male deer.

So the male deer marries the female chicken, and because of this blessed union I get to see butt cracks - and not an inch of skin more - at Aussie Thunder, a male revue.  Revue being the internationally understood word for "full frontal prohibited".


A green card wedding

We kind of, sort of know this French couple.  We're not close but we run in similar circles, which is good enough for an invite to a last minute "green card wedding".  She got a job in America, and up to this point they have been dirty sinners living in filthy sin, not unlike ourselves.  Unfortunately Uncle Sam doesn't roll that way, so they had to get married immediately to appease the U.S. Department of Immigration & You Don't Get To Make Life Decisions For Yourself.

You guys, this was the best wedding I have ever been to.  No offence to readers whose weddings I have attended (rest assured your reception was waaaaay better than this one), but you see this picture?  This is a picture of the groom getting down on one knee, with a ring, asking his bride to marry him.  At their wedding ceremony.

It. Was. Awesome.

Apparently there was no engagement ring involved prior to the wedding ceremony, as this was strictly a wedding of necessity.  I don't judge because I'm quite sure it will happen to me someday, and the USA is unreasonable in matters of this nature.  But OMG, I had tears.  It was so sweet and heartfelt - and in French so I didn't understand a damn thing - and she was genuinely surprised by his ring and his proposal.  At their wedding ceremony.

I don't take a romantic view of marriage.  It's just how you prove to a government that your relationship is for real.  Seriously you guys, look at how serious and real this relationship is!  **points to piece of paper**  A green card wedding will happen to me, eventually, so I don't judge them one iota.  But still, it gave me the lovey dovey warm fuzzies.  It was magical.  All 7 minutes of it - bonus points to them, let's get to the good stuff!

A live 'Dirty Dancing' floor show

It's no surprise to most of you that I am a fanatical Rocky Horror Picture Show fan.  I love Rocky Horror.  Like, a lot a lot.

By extension of that I will attend any live "floor show" offered to me, a floor show meaning the movie playing on the big screen and actors acting out the scenes on the stage below.

Since I have dragged friends to the Rocky Horror floor show numerous times it's only fair that I join them in their number one cinematic love on stage, Dirty Dancing.  Not that I mind, mind you, because one truth will remain until my dying day: Ain't nothing sexier than 80's Patrick Swayze.  Ain't nothing.

Well....I take that back.  70's Tim Curry in drag is sexier.  Maybe.

It was super fun!  Of course.  Can you believe this is only the second time I've seen Dirty Dancing start to finish?  Yeah, I know, I'm like diseased or something!  I've seen bits and pieces on TBS (an American TV station) hundreds of times, but the only time I've seen it in its entirety was my freshman year of college, when my dorm roommate was aghast that I'd never seen it all before.  So she made me sit and watch it, right the and there.  It was the longest amount of time we ever spent awake together.

Various trips to City Hall

I make it sound like we go there often, but we've been there a total of two times.  That's actually more than most people have been there, so it's a decently impressive feat.

Vino a la City Hall

City Hall has just reopened after a bajillion dollar renovation.  Look at this gigantic organ (on the right, behind the screen)!

I'm a crap picture taker but the organ is absolutely massive.  Totes impressive.  The place is all around beautiful, as it well should be after spending beaucoup bucks on the reno.  Ahh, the beauty of it:

Wait - whut?

Swastikas in City Hall!  In the bathrooms of all places!  I'm sure it's an original design of the who-knows-how-old building, but seriously.  Woah.

I should get off my arse now and unpack the new apartment a little.  I know I need to, but I know won't.  Not until company comes over.  It's a dirty little secret of mine that I don't clean/tidy up/not live in filth until people come over.

Somebody come visit me before the rats form a society and take over!  I kid, I kid.

But seriously, though, I don't do any housework until I have guests to impress.

No comments:

Post a Comment