Wednesday, June 12, 2019

Orange County + Los Angeles

The worst part about going home to visit friends and family is the necessity of flying through Los Angeles airport.  It is the ninth circle of hell and if you've managed to avoid it you are living your best life.

I very cleverly found a route to avoid it on Air Canada via Vancouver, so by visiting Orange County I transited through LAX willingly in an act of self-flagellation.  All for a good cause!


Hangs with this legend, and rides in his stately miniature pick-up truck.

James and I had reunited a mere six weeks prior in Singapore.  He lives in Vietnam but visits his ancestral home of The OC regularly.  When I was considering my NoDak transit options we pieced it together so we had a few days together.

I'd only day tripped to the Los Angeles area before, once in high school and once after a very traumatic experience 3 years ago.  I only got to see slivers of the area back then, so was pleased to cover more ground with a local guide and his sweet ride.

Huntington Beach


James went to high school here, which blows my mind.  Real people do real things in such a picturesque and urban setting!  Our main priority for my first evening:



Fish tacos and wine, with his fantastic and fun mama Janet.  It was all very lovely and civilized, for a while.


After mama went home for the night we proceeded to get real sloppy on jugs of beer.  A debit card was lost along the way, but later recovered.  The best outcome of the night was James won a food and drinks package at a bar for ten people, which he will cash in on his next visit home.  Neither one of us have any idea when or how this contest was entered into.  I'm sad I'll miss that, as I feel legally entitled to be one of the ten guests.

I had the next day, my only full day, planned months in advance, since the moment I decided to stop in LA.

Audience ticket to watch a taping of Conan
To say this is a bucket list item for me would be a gross understatement.  I was beyond thrilled and excited, and didn't care that this would eat up a whole afternoon and therefore eliminate all chance of seeing/doing anything else.  But I didn't care, I had my priorities!

And then they went and cancelled the damn taping two weeks before. 😢 I was gutted, thinking my once-in-a-lifetime opportunity had slipped through my fingers.  But then I realized I'll just visit again another time.  A good excuse to visit James & fam again!  So what did we do instead?

Hollywood Reservoir


Plan B was enjoying a bit of nature, but not for the sake of peace and serenity (which was surprisingly in abundance here).  It was for this:


What's that by my head?  The Hollywood sign!  


A beautiful vantage point, and on a Thursday afternoon almost entirely devoid of people.  It was a long, narrow, winding uphill journey to get here by car so it's not the easiest drive, but it's worth it.  Next stop:

Walk of Fame


Hollywood Boulevard is nothing short of revolting.  So many tourists!  And fake garbage like Madam Tussauds wax museum.  But it's something you should do at least once, as there are some cool things to see around there (though no celebs).

Grauman's a.k.a. Mann's a.k.a. TCL Chinese Theater 


It's had a few name changes since opening in 1927 and it's one of the most famous movie theaters in the world.  The original Star Wars opened here!  We didn't pay to go inside and explore.  Instead we browsed the various hand and footprints of famous people that are out front:


Oh hey, look at this!


You can see the Hollywood sign from one of the intersections, if you lift your eyes up enough to catch it.  You can walk for miles looking down at the stars.

Pro tip: if there's any one star in particular you want to find look up online where it's located.  There are so many (including many random old timey people you've never heard of) that it would be hard if you didn't know where to look.  Which is precisely what we did for my favorite man (besides Conan):


Jeff Goldblum is my free pass and I didn't even know he had a star.  James took me on the hunt for a mysterious, secret star and I was overjoyed to see who it belonged to.  I immediately plopped down next to it for a photo shoot.  Luckily it wasn't in the busiest area of the street (which is around the Chinese theater) so I didn't get trampled.

If you're looking for a new religion, there's one obvious choice in this area.


They're swarming the street, all dressed like valets, like Mormons on steroids.


We did not stop in to test exactly which fatal personality flaws we possess that require expensive remedy, but I'm confident they're the most fun flaws one can have.  Their main church is a short drive away, and I was tickled to get a good shot of it driving by.


All hail Xenu!  Lest anyone accuse me of being unfair I'll repeat what I said to James, after fending off a herd of vest wearing proselytizers: don't take it personal; I'm equally hostile to all religions.

By this time it was well past lunch time (in fact, we didn't get out of the house until after lunch thanks to some good old fashioned American incompetence) and there was one restaurant James simply had to take me to.

Philippe the Original


Philippe's does French "dipped" sandwiches, which I've called French dip sandwiches my entire life.  Also different from the NoDak variety, you don't do the dipping yourself.


They come pre-soaked!  See how the top and bottom buns were dipped before assembly.  Plus it's customary to order with cheese, so we split our order between blue cheese and cheddar.  Delish!  And thanks to the off-peak timing it wasn't a madhouse like it often is.

Philippe's is called the Original because there's another restaurant that makes similar claims that they invented the French dipped sandwich.  Coles is downtown, where we were heading anyway, so we added it to the itinerary.  But we weren't there for more beef.


Their chocolate pie is amazing!  I'd be willing to give their French dip a try in the future, if it means I can get my hands on another piece of this tasty pie and laugh about the plot of The Help.

After our pie we wandered around downtown, seeing many surprisingly ornate buildings and hobos galore.

Angel's Flight



Angel's Flight is a funicular (cable car if you're not familiar with the term) that costs an affordable $1 in each direction.  The ride is pretty short at 91 meters (298 feet) is like a minute of ride time.


It was closed for nearly a decade because the cars slammed into each other in 2001 and killed a guy.  Oops!  But it's back now and presumably safe to carry us up to a nice little courtyard that was surprisingly deserted for a weekday afternoon.


We commuted back home to OC in rush hour traffic, which wasn't nearly as bad as I was expecting it to be.  Yes, there are a million cars on the freeways, but they're moving.  And I didn't see any idiots who had randomly smashed into each other, thus blocking traffic and creating havoc.  This was such a welcomed change to Australian traffic.  I might be wrong here, but it's almost like California drivers know how to drive!

The next day I flew out in late afternoon, so we had one final morning to hang.  This might've been my favorite stop of the whole trip:

Trader Joe's



TJ's is the best grocery store on the planet.  It's very affordable, has amazing products, and pays/treats their workers awesomely.  It's almost mythical how fantastic it is!  We spent a leisurely chunk of time here and I bought as much [shelf stable] food as would fit into the unused crevices of my suitcase.  James had an entire empty suitcase he could check back home to Vietnam, so he filled up a shopping cart and brought it all back with him.  I might do this next time!  I got some fabulous products and my only wish is that I could transport the refrigerated and frozen stuff home with me.

Our next shopping stop was the thrift store, which was very fruitful for James in the way of Halloween and St Patrick's Day preparations.  Nothing for me, though, as my suitcase crevices were all filled with stuff from Trader Joe's.

Lunch time!

In-N-Out Burger


No trip to SoCal - and I mean no trip ever - is complete without a meal at In-N-Out.  They're only located in six states so seize the opportunity when you get the chance for some high quality, tasty fast food!


Those fries are a widely known off-menu "secret" called animal style, which includes melted cheese, grilled onions and their special sauce (called spread).  While the toppings are tasty, after two visits now I've decided that I really don't like their fries.  They're meh.  But what the fries lack is more than made up for in the burgers.  Real life chefs have crowed this place the ultimate fast food joint.  A must eat for those poor saps living in the other 44 states!

Huntington Beach Library


We swung through the ornate local library to kill a bit of time before I had to fly home via Canada, so we browsed the used book sale and tossed some coinage into the wishing well.  I got a copy of Animal Farm, which has been on my reread list for years now, for a quarter.  Who says California is overpriced?

And so ends my 48 hour Southern California adventure.  We did and saw a lot, not to mention ate and drank a lot, in my short time there.  I'm glad we still had plenty of chilling time at Chez Duquette to hang with his folks, too.  I'd met them before in Edinburgh at graduation 7.5 years ago, but I appreciated the chance to see how real people live in a place that, to my small town sensibilities, has always been La La Land.

Friend and fun family aside I will be back for you, Conan.  I. Will. Come. Back!