London Calling

This trip is well over a year old, and it's taken me that long to emotionally recover from the trauma to write about it.  Don't get me wrong, it was 90% good (fantastic, actually), but the 10% that was bad was super bad.  I will elaborate on that cryptic statement later.

Early in 2023 I saw a post on Instagram from my beloved one true lover:

I sent this screenshot to my actual husband and told him, "One day before I die!"  

A few weeks later, he comes to me with an envelope, containing real tickets to see Jeff Goldblum (and the Mildred Snitzer Orchestra - don't forget about them)!  Tickets to see Jeff Goldblum in the flesh!  In London!

Let it be known this is the greatest gift I've ever received, and the greatest gift I ever will receive.  There simply is no topping this.  I was shocked!  And so, so happy-slash-excited.

While fighting back tears of happiness I immediately set to work booking flights, accommodation and activities to fill my weekend, which just happened to be Easter weekend.  The Easter bunny can wait, kids, mama is going to London! 

Almost immediately I booked tickets to another show, one that I had wanted to see for a few years but was thwarted by Covid when living in Australia:

Hamilton

I went to great lengths up to that point to know nothing about this musical until I could see it live on stage.  I didn't know a single song, or anything about the story line.  All I knew is that it was a musical about the life of Alexander Hamilton, with a historically inaccurate racially diverse cast, written by a MacArthur Genius Grant recipient named Lin-Manuel Miranda, and that it was hugely popular.  That is all I knew!  And I also knew I was very likely to love it.  

And I was right!  It kicked so much ass.  The songs were super catchy and fun, the dancing was incredible, and I was with two fun girlfriends to add to the experience.  Yes this was a solo trip, but I reached out to my British friends to arrange various activities, such as drinking champagne and seeing Hamilton.  Jerusha (seen here in 2013 and 2016) and Tori, who I both know through Martin, joined in the West End fun.

We were having a fabulous time, despite them both being British and knowing absolutely nothing about US history, plus one of those two don't even normally like musicals. 

This is where things go south for this meek little tourist from Norway.  When the performance ended I realized my phone was GONE!  I had been robbed in the second row of the theatre watching Hamilton!  It had been there at intermission, but was gone by the end of the show.  I assumed such low class, petty criminality would not be as cultured as I with their entertainment, but clearly I was wrong.

This thievery put such a damper on my trip, because of course I relied so much on my phone to get around, and logging into a new phone is damn near impossible when everything requires 2-factor authentication to a phone number that is probably in Romania before the next curtain call.  It was so, so, so incredibly stressful and thank god I had friends with me who could be in contact with Martin at home (alone with a screaming toddler and screaming baby) to help me with the 2-factor authentication from afar. 

So that sucked.  Hard.  And totally ruined one of my London bucket list items, eating good Indian food that every foodie in town recommends.  It also ate up the half day that should have been spent at the British Museum, which I had meticulously planned to see all the good stuff in exactly 3 hours.  But it turns out due to strikes it was closed that day anyway, so I would have missed out even if I hadn't become a crime victim.  

Imperial War Museum

Another must do item for me was to do some WWII tourism, which nowadays is pretty standard for me regardless of destination.  After weighing up my many options I settled on the Imperial War Museum (on Lambeth Rd, there are a few locations) which has sections on WWI, WWII and the Holocaust. 

Sadly I lost so many cool pictures from this museum, as I foolishly hadn't backed up my photos between going here and going to see Hamilton.  I'm glad that I got all the photos taken by my travel companion, but sadly missed out on photographic evidence of my favorite thing in this museum, the smallest boat that crossed the channel during the evacuation of Dunkirk.

But I do have a picture of my second favorite thing there, a huge bronze Eagle statue that was (literally) ripped off a Nazi building, complete with scrapes and holes from the fall:

Such a fantastic museum and so interesting to my WWII obsessed self!  I could spend days here. 

Actually, my favorite thing within the IWM, which I do I have a picture of but won't post it here, is a picture of a Nazi soldier, Franz Ziereis, naked, dead and strung up on barbed wire when the concentration camp he was in charge of was liberated.  You can find the picture online.  Cathartic!  

Afternoon tea at The Dorchester

Another must do for this trip was fancy afternoon tea.

Preferably featuring a grand piano made out of disco ball material:

Check and check!  Plus, make it champagne afternoon tea, to combine the two greatest things on earth into one magical event.

There are so many fabulous places in London to choose for afternoon tea!  Traditional, modern, I didn't know where to even begin.  So I let Tori do the choosing for me, and she wanted to try The Dorchester.  As long as it was fancy, I was down!

By this time I had a new phone (400 un-budgeted pounds later) up and running so I was starting to feel human again, and could actually enjoy the exquisiteness around me.

Jeff Goldblum & the Mildred Snitzer Orchestra

I am no jazz fan, but if that's what it takes to see Jeff Goldblum in person then I am happy to jam to the smooth stylings of him and his band.  Thankfully a good 60% of the show was him chatting to people in the audience, telling funny stories and making observations about London and the world.  He is just so likable!  In addition to aging like a fine wine.

It was a fun show to watch, and I would absolutely go see them again because more than half of the show is guaranteed to be different from what I saw before.  I went to the show alone, but I definitely didn't feel alone thanks to my very personable and chatty #1 celebrity crush. 

I still can't believe I got to see Jeff Goldblum live and in the flesh!  I will never not be in love with that man.

Jerusha and I went to Borough Market for some food market good eatin', but sadly those photos did not live to see the light of day.  We also rode a double decker bus, which my podunk American self really got a kick out of.  I'm still pissed over a year later that those photos were lost to some thieving yet bizarrely cultured asshole! 

Tori and I did some sightseeing while pharmacy hopping, so I could stock up on good kids drugs that aren't available in Norway.

As a Commonwealth citizen I of course paid my respects to QEII at Westminster Abbey, where she had been laid to rest about 6 months prior:

But then my mates went back to their regularly scheduled lives, and I was on my own.  I was scheduled to depart 9pm Sunday, and planned to meet up with a third friend for a day of shopping and dining before departure, but she had to cancel on me.

However could I entertain myself, alone?!  I had been with Jerusha and/or Tori pretty much the whole weekend up to that point, or on a date with Jeff Goldblum.  Then I noticed a theatre conveniently located between the tube station and my hotel.  

Wicked

Sunday matinee, the perfect way to spend a day on my own and squeeze in one more show.
 
For those keeping track, I saw three shows in three days while in London.  I love the theater!

I'd never seen Wicked before, and I have a life goal to see every musical that exists on stage, and while we're at it I will add a goal to have afternoon tea at every establishment in London that offers it.  That is my idea of a luxurious life! 

I wasn't as ignorant about this show as I forced myself to be about Hamilton, and I have always loved the song Defying Gravity.  I can safely say it was the best piece of live music I have ever heard in my life.  It was beyond incredible and whoever that singer was I hope she's got multiple Tonys (or is that just for Broadway?) or Grammys under her belt, because homegirl deserves it.

I had such an amazing weekend away that was actually quite relaxing as I had respite from being responsible for 2 small human lives.  Yes, there is a big pimple on my memories of this trip, but the positives outweighed that one big negative.  It was the greatest gift of all time!